Come up to the lab, and see what’s on the slab

There is no truth to the rumor that PostgreSQL has been acquired by TransMeta to be renamed TrangreSQL. It is a further baseless rumor that they will build a new web framework on this, based on a suite of custom applications. Finally, it is patently untrue that their new motto will be the following.

Just a suite TransWebSite from TrangreSQL, TransMeta

Dr. Frank N. Furter declined to comment on any of these unsubstantiated rumors, saying only (and with emphasis, “Ha ha!”

Dinner conversation


Yesterday was my birthday, which really has nothing to do with this, aside from the fact that the following conversation (as well as I was able to capture it from memory later) took place at dinner on that day:

“Why is the rat food weighed down by a phone book?”

“Had to, the gravity was pretty iffy yesterday.”


“The gravity was out all over town. I called BC Gravity, but they just said they were working on it and they’d have gravity restored as soon as they could. They said 2000 homes were affected, but they were working round the clock to get it fixed.”

My kids are growing up in a very strange world.

Giant Gull Threatens to Eat The Buddha!

Giant Gull Threatens to Eat Buddha

Worldwide Buddha Defence Teams Scrambled and Buddha Pre-emptive Protection Systems are Activated.

The Current Buddha Alert Level is Saffron.

[Photo courtesy of Brian Oberquell]

In the future, all websites will be handwritten

Daniel Gordon had the first hand-written website that I am aware of, existing unchanged from 1999 to 2007 (via Wayback Machine).

The invention of photography and gas stoves in 2007 allowed Miranda July to update the concept.

And today, of course, there are handwritten social networks.

That is all.

Captain Ordinary

I want to create a new superhero.

He’s going to be exactly like Captain Marvel except that instead of saying “Shazam!” he’s going to say “Zapdoodle!”

And instead of being Aryan he’s going to be vaguely multi-ethnic.

And instead of battling generalized injustice he will fight a specific injustice, like homelessness or suburban sprawl.

And instead of having popular support people will mock him and try to have him arrested.

And instead of having a uniform of red spandex he will have a uniform of random clothes from Salvation Army.

And instead of having a sidekick he will have his sides kicked when he sleeps on the street.

And instead of having a secret identity, people just won’t really care who he is.

And instead of being young, tall, athletic and arguably handsome, he will be short, pudgy, and middle-aged, with a pronounced limp.

OK, so he’s not going to be much like Captain Marvel at all.

But he will say “Zapdoodle!”

In fact, he may not say anything else, ever.

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